I got this email today that seemed to be the usual pro-torure rant, till I got to the gem at the end. If you aren't one of the lucky ones who have received this for yourself, or even if you are, it's a jaw-dropper [my commentary in brackets]:
<begin email>
Bad taste is simply saying the truth before it
should be said”
-Mel Brooks
[The thing about Mel Brooks is that he's a comedian, and the king of not taking things seriously.]
I
don't know who wrote it but they should have signed it. Some
powerful words. This woman should run for president.
Written
by a housewife from New Jersey and sounds like it! This is one ticked
off lady.
[Note the two disjointed intros - a sure sign of a tampered chain email.]
'Are we fighting a war on terror or
aren't we? Was it or was it not started by Islamic people who brought
it to our shores on September 11, 2001?
[Good question. Congress: have you declaired an act of war? *crickets*]
Were people from all
over the world, mostly Americans, not brutally murdered that day, in
downtown Manhattan, across the Potomac from our nation's capitol and
in a field in Pennsylvania?
Did nearly three
thousand men, women and children die a horrible, burning or crushing
death that day, or didn't they?
[One of the most brutal acts of hate to date.]
And I'm
supposed to care that a copy of the Koran was 'desecrated' when an
overworked American soldier kicked it or got it wet?...Well, I
don't. I don't care at all.
[Can't say I believe in desecration, but that doesn't mean he wasn't an asshole.]
I'll start
caring when Osama bin Laden turns himself in and repents
for incinerating all those innocent people on 9/11.
I'll care about the Koran when the fanatics
in the Middle East start caring about the Holy Bible, the mere
possession of which is a crime in Saudi Arabia.
[Really? You'll read theirs if they read yours? Somehow I doubt it.]
I'll care when these thugs tell the world they are sorry for
chopping off Nick Berg's head while Berg screamed through his
gurgling slashed throat.
[Can't say I've ever felt empathy for those who commit crimes against humanity.]
I'll care when
the cowardly so-called 'insurgents' in Iraq come out and fight like
men instead of disrespecting their own religion by hiding in mosques.
[You know, like how we "came out and fought like men" instead of hiding behind trees during the Revolutionary War... oh wait...]
I'll care when the mindless zealots who blow
themselves up in search of nirvana care about the innocent children
within range of their suicide..
[I'm going to assume this was to say "suicide bombs". Also, religion fail - Nervana isn't found in Islam, it's a belief of Buddhism, a very peaceful religion.]
I'll care
when the American media stops pretending that their First Amendment
liberties are somehow derived from international law instead of the
United States Constitution's Bill of Rights.
[Anyone have any idea what this one is about?]
In the meantime, when I hear a story about a brave marine
roughing up an Iraqi terrorist to obtain information, know this: I
don't care.
[Because it's so brave to beat up someone who isn't armed.]
When I see a fuzzy photo of a
pile of naked Iraqi prisoners who have been humiliated in what
amounts to a college-hazing incident, rest assured: I don't care.
[Hear that, people? College hazing is A-OK!]
When I see a wounded terrorist get shot in
the head when he is told not to move because he might be
booby-trapped, you can take it to the bank: I don't care.
When I hear that a prisoner, who was issued a
Koran and a prayer mat, and fed 'special' food that is paid for by my
tax dollars, is complaining that his holy book is being 'mishandled,'
you can absolutely believe in your heart of hearts: I don't care.
[Can't say I care when the Bible is mishandled either, but I don't do it, cause that would make me an asshole.]
And oh, by the way, I've noticed that
sometimes it's spelled 'Koran' and other times 'Quran.' Well, Jimmy
Crack Corn and-you guessed it-I don't care!!
[Donuts, doughnuts, same pastry.]
If you agree with this viewpoint, pass this on to all your
E-mail friends. Sooner or later, it'll get to the people responsible
for this ridiculous behavior!
[That's right - send it to all your terrorist friends, then they'll learn their lesson.]
If you don't
agree, then by all means hit the delete button. Should you choose the
latter, then please don't complain when more atrocities committed by
radical Muslims happen here in our great Country! [Because they'll all know you deleted this. And they'll be watching... and waiting...] And may I
add:
'Some people spend an entire lifetime
wondering if they made a difference in the world. But, the Marines
don't have that problem' --
Ronald Reagan
I have another quote that I would like to add AND.......I hope
you forward all this.
'If we ever forget
that we're One Nation Under God, then we will be a nation gone under'
Also by.. Ronald Reagan
One last thought for
the day:
In case we find ourselves starting
to believe all the Anti-American sentiment and negativity, we should
remember England 's Prime Minister Tony Blair's words during a recent
interview. When asked by one of his Parliament members why he
believes so much in America , he said: 'A simple way to take measure
of a country is to look at how many want in.. And how many want out.'
[Turns out it's a lot harder to move to another country than you'd think. I know - I've tried.]
Only two defining forces have ever offered to
die for you:
1. Jesus Christ [Wait, what?]
2. The American G. I.
One died for your soul, the other for your
freedom. [No, srsly, what was that?]
YOU MIGHT WANT TO PASS THIS ON,
AS MANY SEEM TO FORGET BOTH OF THEM. [Did I just see what I thought I saw?]
Classification:
UNCLASSIFIED
Caveats:
NONE
<end email>
HOLY CRACKERS! This person just ended a rant all about how torture and revenge are OK with a reminder of Jesus! Well, maybe it's not the same Jesus Christ as the one in the Bible.. Maybe this one actually did call down legions of angels to protect him. Maybe he did let his friends cut off the soldiers' ears. Maybe he said "70 x 7 is too many times to forgive, just stick with 7 times." Maybe this Jesus Christ said "whomever makes you walk 1 mile, only walk for him 1/2 mile, because he is too rude for a full one." Yeah, that must be the Jesus Christ the person in this email is talking about.
P.S. Read original version of this email here:
http://www.truthorfiction.com/rumors/d/doug-patton.htm
Comments (11)
Now, if we dumb down the language, shorten the sentences, and throw out the somewhat-decent grammar, all we would have left if the mindless rant of an egocentric spoiled brat screaming "I want! I want! Me! Me! Me!"
Either way, I would think Mel Brooks would be a little embarrassed to be associated with this piece.
[That's right - send it to all your terrorist friends, then they'll learn their lesson.]
ROFL!!!
Jawsome.
Man...I have missed your posts.
Just another ignorant, petty Christo-fascist, wallowing in their hate like pigs and too stupid to seperate their religion from their petty nationalism. An embarrassment to civilised people everywhere and one of the reasons so many people turn their backs on any form of spirituality and gentle patriotism.
It's pretty clear that this person is completely ignorant of the histoy of U.S. Government being involved with middle east, and the problems that our U.S. government has caused in that area.
Really I don't know what to say. I'm just too embarrassed to call myself an "american patriot" or a "christian" nowadays.
How does this inspire people?
@drung888 - Mel Brooks would have a field day with this piece!
@anaraug - Aww... I'd say the best thing to do is be who you think you should be, and then if people ask what you call yourself, then you can tell them. That way they see you first and not your labels.
@SkyMarshalOz - People use things like this as a justification of hate they already feel, and just need an excuse to express. For most people who don't have this sort of revenge mindset, it's sad and frightening to read, and rightly so.
@Lovegrove - Why is it that the gentle ones are the quietest ones? I'm sure there are a lot of them out there, but they are sadly under-represented in the general discourse.
I have to admire the author's persistence. For having such a wonderful, educated, compassionate (I hear that word bandied about in those circles) world-view, he/she must have really exhausted their stash of heard, imbibed, and vomited (HIV) opinions in an effort to write that email. All to provide a laugh on the web.
Does the author know that she and one or more Muslims (or Moslems) are statistically likely to have consumed the same air and water within their lifetime? Oh, the stain!
Eh, when I introduce myself here in Germany, I say I'm an exception, but I'm also from the USA. They usually get it. The one guy who was complaining carte blanche about The French asked where I was from. I told him Northern California, next to Canada. I then straight-faced fed him some other half-truths about californian stereotypes and walked away. Poor dumb German. Your stupidity is still smarter than the willfully ignorant bigotry of folks from my country.
People like that scare me--truly they do.
If torture is so fabulous why are we constantly given guilt trips about how Jesus was tortured and killed for our sins? And if religion makes you so moral why are the most religious people so gung-ho for torture?